Orange Slice

Being really really old does not mean it is good; take Rupert Murdoch, for example.


But jokes about evil people aside, we’re dealing with an evil biscuit today.

The orange slice, with its place in the coveted Assorted Creams, is a stand-out for being routinely awful. Arnott’s will boast about ‘real oranges!' on the packet, but the ingredients list reveal this to be an oil extract and a citric acid, which results in an extremely concentrated flavour. I’m a fan of citrus sweets in general, but this disappoints with a chemical-y and overall artificial impression.

Velvety orange cream layered between two lightly golden sweet biscuits. Arnott’s Orange Slice has been a cream biscuit classic since 1992!


Other than the r/unexpectedfactorial in that description (it’s roughly 10^1709 by the way, after the heat death of the universe), I’m fairly certain it’s also a typo. Woolworths and Coles’ descriptions both list it as 1922, a much more impressive age to be boasting about. Seriously, between this and biscuits missing from their website, I’m don’t know if there’s anyone left on the maintenance team when the company was sold.

Anyway, back on topic. I’m not alone on this tirade, by the way. It’s at a point that news of the organisation restructure led to speculation that the biscuit might be axed, and it’s the even become the victim of political satire.

If you couldn’t tell by now, the Orange Slice will not be scoring highly on the definitive list. At the time of writing, it will debut at number 19 - the current bottom of the barrel.

(I bought an entire individual packet of these for this review instead of an Assorted Creams pack - think of my sacrafice and don’t make the same mistake, please.)